Nobody tells you this, but heartbreak is inconvenient, messy, and slow. It distorts time, expectations, and reality, and there is no deadline for feeling better. This is about setting realistic expectations so you can actually heal.
1. Accept That Healing Will Not Be Fast
When your heart breaks, nothing snaps back to normal in a week. That expectation alone will sabotage your healing. Heartbreak takes time. There is no shortcut around it.
2. Go Through It. Not Over It.
The only way out is through.
- Not over it.
- Not under it.
- Not around it.
Avoidance only delays the inevitable. Feeling is not weakness. It is part of the process.
3. Let Yourself Feel Without Denial
You are not different from anyone else who has been hurt. If you deny what you’re feeling, you prolong the pain. If you let yourself feel it, you move forward. Grief demands acknowledgment.
4. Track Your Healing, Not Your Ex
Journaling is powerful because it shows progress you cannot always see in real time.
- Write what you feel.
- Write what changes.
- Write what hurts less than it did yesterday.
Healing becomes real when it’s documented.
5. Change Something That Outlives the Pain
Do something that alters your long-term future.
- A new hobby.
- A new environment.
- A new routine.
- A new city if that’s what it takes.
These changes remind you that one person is not the end of your story.
6. Zoom Out and Reclaim Your Future
This moment feels heavy because you’re living inside it. Look past today. Look at next week. Next month. Next year. Your life is bigger than this heartbreak, even if it doesn’t feel like it yet.
7. Reflect Before You Re-enter Love
When the pain settles, self-awareness begins.
- Ask yourself what went wrong.
- What patterns showed up?
- What you ignored.
- What you won’t tolerate again.
- If you don’t learn from it, you repeat it.
And nobody deserves to stay stuck in the same cycle of the same bullshit.
Some days will feel heavy. Others will feel manageable. Both mean you’re moving forward. Give yourself time. Healing is already in motion.
If you want somewhere to put what this brought up, I created a 7-day journal to walk through these steps slowly and honestly.
The Through It: Heartbreak journal is available for deeper reflection.
DISCLAIMER:
Images on this site are credited appropriately and are chosen to complement the themes of the poems and blogs. If the artist cannot be identified, the source of the image will be provided. All artwork and doodles in the Art section are original creations by TPL. All poetry, blogs, and writings are the sole creations and intellectual property of TPL. Thank you for visiting!
The Poet libby 
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