Steve Harvey’s 90 Day Rule

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My thoughts:

The 90-day rule is for the kind of women who don’t know what they want, they need guidance, and they probably give it up easily (their cookie), but then feel ashamed. I am not saying that giving it up easily is bad; what I am saying is giving it up easily and getting mad when the guy leaves is dumb. 

Everyone should know by now that not all guys have good intentions. (ladies too) But I am focusing on guys right now and the fact that they are sometimes only around for 1 thing. 

YOUR COOKIE!

The whole thing about the 90-day rule is to give yourself time to get to know a guy before you give yourself away. This should give you enough information to decide whether or not you see a future with this guy, or if you want to bang him and move on, or just move on. 

However, after 90 days, you give yourself away, and he leaves the second it’s done. You just wasted 90 days because you didn’t see his intentions from the beginning. A guy will wait if he knows he is going to get rewarded at the end. A guy likes a challenge, remember?!

“I remember I was talking to this guy who pursued me for a whole year. I was crushing on him, but he only wanted sex. He took me out on dates, walks in the parks, and all this cute stuff; we even argued like a couple. One night, I was feeling some type of way, and I went for it (after a year of knowing him). He didn't leave, but he didn't want me in the way I wanted him. He wanted to be FWB (friends with benefits). Nothing wrong with that, but that’s not what I wanted, so I left. It took me a moment to face the facts, but I knew that if I stayed, I would not benefit from this situation. Always know when to draw the line, know your limits, and respect yourself. He still tries to HMU for a booty call years later. lol.”

This rule was not created so that you could expect magic to happen in 90 days. It won’t be like the movie where everything just worked out because the guy realized he loved her and all that. A guy will tell you ANYTHING you want to hear to get between your legs. After that, it’s done. This is why you have to be selective in who you get involved with because not everyone is going to be good for you.

Also, unless you are spending a boatload of time with this person, 90 days is not enough to get to know someone enough to know if you are going to spend the rest of your life with them. There are exceptions and scenarios in which this may work out:

Scenario #1- You get to know him quickly in 90 days because you are both on the same page, and you disclose personal information early in the relationship. So, when it comes time to give him your cookie, he appreciates it and stays. And then you live happily ever after, the end.

Scenario #2– You mutually decide to wait.

Comment below if this has worked for you!

The point is that you need to know what you want if you want this to work. You can’t settle for less when you start becoming anxious or desperate. The right one will come along, okay? Don’t give it up to just anyone unless you know he is staying, or you know you just wanted that 1 thing as well. 

Although you never know if a person is going to stay. A relationship is putting your heart on the line every day and trusting that this person wakes up and still feels the same.

We are grown here, no need for BS games. (and if you’re not grown, then you need to be in touch with yourself to make well-thought-out decisions.) (Having sex doesn’t make you grow.)

Thank you for tuning in. If you have any questions, comments, or opinions, let them out! Have a blessed day!